I envy people who have had a best friend since kindergarten. Having moved around a lot sort of prevented me, I think, from really cementing friendships. I also recall not feeling as though I fit in with kids when I was in my elementary school years, all the way through high school really. I wasn’t interested in the things they talked about. I distinctly remember not understanding some of why the girls I was friends with were always getting mad at each other. There was too much drama and it was overwhelming. I remember thinking to myself at that time that I could have played along to stay in the group, but it just wasn’t worth it. So I distanced myself. Some of those girls are still good friends today … but I wasn’t one of them. It’s just as well. I know it wasn’t meant for me. My best friends when I was younger were actually boys. There was less drama, less cattiness, and just overall I had more fun running with the boys than pretending to be puppies with the girls (yes, that really was a choice for me to make during one recess). Sometimes I wish I didn’t have such a good memory.
Friends doesn’t necessarily mean “friendly” competitors. I felt most of my girl friends K-12 secretly hated me, sort of like the Mean Girls thing. I found out, at least for a few of them, that I was right. I never understood the reasoning to hang out with someone you don’t actually like. What do you gain from it?