This is the second week of my final semester of my doctorate… before I just have my dissertation.
Yikes.
I did manage to exercise today, though, which is positive.
I’ve found that I often beat myself up for not being where I think I should be, pretty much I beat myself up for not being… well, different. But I am who I am, and I’ve spent years trying to run from it. From my anxiety, my personality, my tastes… I got good at being a chameleon for a while… good at going to parties, drinking, being who I thought people wanted me to be. But it was disingenuous, not only to me but to them. I try to make a conscious effort not to slide back into my old habits of mind reading and trying to be what I think people want me to be. It got exhausting… and while it’s scarier sometimes to just be myself and be honest, it’s much easier and more rewarding in the long run. I think that’s my only tip for this week.
You can’t control what people think of you, regardless of if you’re being yourself or not… so why not just be yourself, otherwise you won’t know if people like the real you anyway.
Eternal Ocean of Words 