Blogust! Attention, Focus, and Neurodiversity

Greetings! I can’t believe it is already August. 2020 appears to have sucked time into a void or something. Anyway, I will be attempting to blog every day of August. Today’s entry will be on attention and focus.

I’m fairly certain that the term neurodiverse likely fits for me. I was recently watching a YouTube video of a young lady with autism, saying that she has always felt driven to write, extensively, about anything and everything–not to say that all writers have autism, but I definitely relate and have often pondered if that label may fit for me. I feel like I process my experience by writing about it, so I can see it in different ways, and sometimes, when I’m brave enough, get feedback on it. Even my creative endeavors are a manifestation of my experience I’m sure… even if it’s on an unconscious level.

I get hung up details quite often and it’s hard for me to transition from one thing to the next if I don’t meet the threshold of what I wanted to accomplish. I can be intently focused at times… and at others I feel so distractable.

As of late, I’ve been taking better care of myself, but my thoughts are all over the place. I have so many things that I would like to do and I’ll be thinking about other creative endeavors/projects while I’m still working on a different one. It’s wonderful to feel like I’m in a creative space for the first time in a long time, but it’s also a bit overwhelming and I tend to over-commit myself because I get excited. I also make unrealistic to-do lists for myself each day… rarely do I accomplish everything on them, but I try.

It’s strange how it seems like the universe opens up opportunities for you when you start to take better care of yourself. Things fall in your lap and you meet people who understand your experiences.

The rain is rhythmically dripping from a gutter. I’m outside on the porch. I do my best work outside because I don’t feel like I’m “missing” anything. That’s the best way I can describe it. I always want to be outside. I’ve always felt that way … as a child “just let me go outside!” My attention and focus always draws back to nature, if I don’t get my fill of it, it seems near impossible for me to focus on anything else. As I get older it has put into perspective what really matters. Working hard is important, but giving my focus and attention to things that bring me peace is really where it’s at. That includes for me:

• Nature/the sea
• Creative writing
• Authentic self expression
• Authentic connection with other people/meeting of the minds/sharing experiences

This was kind of all over the place, but it feels good to commit to blogging here again and I hope it will extend beyond August. God knows a new professor needs an outlet 🙂

 

Much love to you

Natalie

 

 

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