A Day for Myself

  Today I swam in a lake, even though I couldn't see the bottom and I felt the sun on my skin while I read and wrote. I took the day entirely to myself and went to Moraine State Park, in spite of the work I could be doing on my dissertation and coursework for [...]

Wellness Wednesday: Guilt, Shame, and Forgiveness

June 6th is always a hard date/anniversary for me. It's strange that Wellness Wednesday happened to fall on it, when I haven't been doing this for very long. Five years ago today my Grandma on my mom's side passed away while I was holding her hand. I was watching her breath fog up her oxygen [...]

Wellness Wednesday

My own computer was not cooperating, so I am writing this brief post at school. I think over the past week I have come to recognize and value simplicity in my life. I don't mean to say simple-mindedness, I mean weeding out the fluff, unnecessary hassles and people in my life. I have gotten better [...]

Wellness Wednesday

This new title of "Wellness Wednesdays" seems more hypocritical each week as my anxiety gets worse and I continue to overeat and workout less. But maybe I do have more reason than normal to have my anxiety activated this week at least. I went to a conference over the weekend and presented. While my presentation [...]

Wellness Wednesday

I think my anxiety posts every Wednesday have naturally sort of evolved into other topics being incorporated. So, I think I'm going to shift the title/tag to "Wellness Wednesday," which seems more inclusive and encompassing everything that goes along with my struggle with anxiety. For my program, it just so happens that April is a [...]

High Functioning Anxiety 11

It's Wednesday again, huh? Not really sure what to write. I've been keeping up with school work, just doing the minimum, which is what I can manage right now. And I'm kind of ok with that. My current circumstances have allowed me to take better care of myself and I'm grateful for that. I did, [...]

Night Terror Last Night

Feeling upside down today. My anxiety has been relatively calm since I returned from Belize, so I am not sure what, if anything, spurred this. I spoke with my therapist about my dream this morning. I had the sensation that it was a long and involved dream, but here are the bits I remember: I [...]

High Functioning Anxiety 9

The last week or so has been pretty miserable for me. I find one of my trauma/anxiety/whatever is wrong with me triggers is feeling like I can't say no to something or being so stressed and confused to the max to where I can't make good decisions or feeling forced into something. That has been [...]