2019 Reflection and 2020 Goals

I can't believe another year has gone by... time really does fly. If 2019 taught me anything, it’s that you can’t wait for people to show up for you how you want them to and the sooner you accept yourself for who you are— your true nature, the less time you’ll waste and the less [...]

Job Searching

before you've finished your dissertation can be so overwhelming. Am I serious about moving? Could I be happy in that town/state/region etc? Do the faculty have similar research interests to me? To what degree are they similar? Does that matter? Ugh.   I don't think I would mind adjuncting while I figure all of that [...]

Isolation

Dissertation writing can be so isolating. I always chide myself for not tying harder to stay in touch with my cohort, but people grow apart everyone has their own lives. Also, in the back of my mind I often think people are sick of me anyway. lol. I should be done with my dissertation by [...]

Most Comfortable at a Distance

I can see the glowing lights I can see them every night Really not that far away I could be there in a day I wonder if you live there still I kind of think you always will If I tried, you'd probably be Hard to find. Teaching is such s humbling experience, especially when [...]

Good Mentorship

Is so invaluable. Especially when you don't feel like any of your fears, worries, or other emotions were really heard growing up. My best mentors can tell me when I'm overreacting and I don't take offense to it because of their delivery. It's so refreshing. To be validated but then also given another perspective in [...]

Last month of the year

This year has been insane in a lot of ways. I've grown so much personally and professionally. My circle has thinned and I'm ok with almost all of those changes. Sometimes when you're an intense person like I am you can't stand surface level connection or friendships. I keep people who offer me shallow connection [...]

This week is going to be a doozy

I want to try to blog every day in December. Not sure how that will go, but what the heck. I'll try. The semester is winding down. I present at a forensics conference Tuesday. Teach Thursday and work Friday ... but I'm anxious about Friday apparently for a dumb reason: I have to wear a [...]

“Wellness” During Dissertation

I'm starting to believe that there may not be such a thing, that undertaking such a task is in and of itself "crazy" and unhealthy. It certainly feels that way at times, no matter how invested I am in my education and my dissertation topic and no matter how hard a worker I am and [...]

Peace

That's really all I want. Nothing has been reinforced more in 2019 for me than that. I just want to live in a tension free environment and be around people who are transparent. My experiences growing up definitely taught me that money can get you a lot of things, but it can't give you peace. [...]