The Horrors of Online Dating [and Entitled Men?] Part 1

I'm certain I'm not the only person who has experienced less than ideal dates after meeting someone on an online platform. lol. However, it never ceases to amaze me: the complete lack of tact and class of some folks... when I recall my own online dating experiences and learn of others' experiences too. I also [...]

True Attraction and Connection

Not very long ago when I was out and about at a dance event a male dance acquaintance of mine was talking about the frustrations of online dating. While I haven't used any of those platforms in a while, I can definitely relate. You think you might hit it off with someone and then they [...]

Two Faced

I've got pretty good at spotting two faced people a mile away. Their words don't match their actions. They tell the truth, or, more likely, partial truths when it suits them. A lot of the time this type of thing develops because people are too wishy washy to take a stand, or they just like [...]

How do you know if you’ve forgiven someone?

This is a tough thing to think about, and people often get it confused with saying what someone did is okay. Not so. I'm always learning about myself and what it means to be in connection with other people, but from what I've gleaned so far, forgiveness can be pretty complex. Here is how you [...]

Today’s Thought

If you're afraid to voice your needs in your relationship, then you're afraid of the "consequences" of having needs/being seen. Trauma Trauma Trauma

Do you really, 100%, trust others?

Is it possible to completely trust another person? Maybe with some things but not others? People disappoint each other, unintentionally and on purpose, that is just part of being in relationships with others. I've been struggling lately with the extent of my trust in people (and it isn't a whole lot to begin with, mind [...]

Mental Load

I recently had a conversation with a friend about carrying the mental load in any connection with another person: romantic connections, friendships and working relationships. What do I mean by mental load ? Let me illustrate. Do you ever feel like the secretary in your friend group or colleague group? Meaning If there’s a meeting, [...]

Through the Storm

I sat out on the front porch today to do some work as a storm raged. Water was streaming off the roof just a few feet away. It was in the afternoon and really dark. Kind of matches my mood today. I'm not ready for the semester to start. I'm holding on as best I [...]

Trauma and Communication

I was recently working on something with a client of mine and realized that it applies to me as well at times. Essentially we identified that she expected her boyfriend to read her mind, to be able to meet her needs without her asking. Wouldn’t that be splendid? A lover that knew everything you needed [...]

It’s my birthday

Photo by Ylanite Koppens on Pexels.com 32 years old today... where has time gone? I think I was dissociated for much of my 20s, but hey--- better late than never to become conscious and aware I suppose. Trauma, yay. But in all honesty every year since I've turned 30 has been the best year ever [...]