I felt very bad earlier today. Making plans often triggers me in ways I don't readily become aware of. I've dealt with flakey people a lot and I'm a firm believer that you should never chase people to hang out with you. If they want to, they will. Period. However, my past and my anxiety [...]
I am a firm believef that good therapists receive their own therapy to become more and more self-aware and to never stop growing/pushing their growing edge. My own therapy started many years ago at a very bad time in my life when I thought my anxiety was going to take over and I would have [...]
Hello internet and happy Wednesday. I haven't been very happy today, but I guess I can be proud that I worked out anyway and have been trying to stick to my resolution of working out regularly at the Y. Yay. On to the wellness topic for this week. It can be extremely hard to take [...]
When trauma responses are activated they can look different based on the individual; however, broadly, they likely include the following: intrusive thoughts, unpleasant bodily sensations, heightened emotions, hyperarousal (fight or flight). Oftentimes if trauma has been a part of your life, you may be living pretty consistently in a state of hyperarousal, which can be [...]
You don't trust people. You're able to "fake it" and appear connected with others on the surface, but you find yourself having visceral reactions of fear and disgust and pain when you have to rely on another person. You would rather do things yourself so you don't have to worry about or deal with involving [...]
Somehow amidst all of my end of semester madness, I am doing some extra reading. I am reading a book about the trauma related to experiencing infidelity in a relationship. The author makes the claim: Women are more easily traumatized because they invest more of themselves in relationships. I agree with this. It has been [...]
There are days when I can find joy even in the smallest of things the smallest of worlds. But when my darkness descends I no longer have access. It wasn't me who experienced that connection that peace. It couldn't have been. That joy whatever it was, wasn't me.
I'm so messed up I didn't even realize it was Wednesday until now. I'm sitting in the parking lot of my university listening to The National before having to be around people for the next 7 hours. The thought is just exhausting and I'm seriously considering just going home after the meetings I absolutely [...]
Not doing much better since my post last night, but I do try to hang on to the fact that there are some days that I do well and that when some things in my life straighten out over the next year or so I'll probably be better able to take care of myself. I [...]
I think I've recently realized just how much trauma affects every aspect of your life. Like, every aspect. Even when I'm feeling pretty good, I find myself looking for things that I should worry about or that I might have forgotten to pay attention to, almost as if my brain is like uncomfortable with peace. [...]
